Reflection
Friday, June 27, 2008, 6/27/2008 02:04:00 PM
ReflectionTo be honest, when I woke up this morning, I just wanted to carry on sleeping, but I couldn't. I have a feeling of fear in my heart, my mind was thinking of alot of things and I just shrugged it off. But as hours grew by, I think more and more.
AhDi1 talk to AhDi2
AhDi1: "Why am I feeling this way?".
AhDi2: "I have so many things to commit like work, AC, attachment etc. but everything seems to be clashing with one another, my life seems to be work at this moment, AC at another moment. My life seems like zipping through, no time for me to slow down. And I just want to lie in my bed, looking at the clock pass by seconds by seconds."
AhDi1: "Than why don't give up some of your commitment?"
AhDi2: "I may want to give up on my job."
So I go and ask my mum for opinion, "Ma, I think I can't cope with my school thingy." And she says, "you work only on Fri, Sat and Sun. Why can't cope? See if you work, than you will feel that you have money to spent. Dad 1 month only earn $$$, we still have to pay for bills etc.. ..."
She just give me more stress but I understand that she doesn't know what the situation i'm in. But it's true that I need money to survive as they doesn't give me much. So I thought, why don't I work on other weekdays that doesn't clash with events? Yes. I will try that option now.
I also ask myself, "is all this happening because I re-run for AC main comittee?" The answer is Yes. And do i regret it? No, Never. Since I step into it already, theres no more turning back. Some people may say that i'm stupid, but I don't care. However, sometimes I just felt bad that I have to spoil the plans of other people because of my other commitment. You can just feel that the pressure is on your shoulder, and theres nothing you can do about it... You just hope that the people will understand the situation you are in. I just hope that people will give me more time to change the situation i'm in.
It's not about what time you can give. It's about giving time to people who needs it.
Reflected~
*.*"
